B

The Ballad of Cable Hogue (1970): After the over the top violence of The Wild Bunch, Sam Peckinpah turned about face and delivered this (relatively) quiet gem. The title character is left to die in the desert by his outlaw buddies, but he survives when he finds a waterhole - a precious commodity in such a harsh environment. He proceeds to make a decent living selling the water to travelers, until his old partners in crime show up. Often overlooked because it's sandwiched between Peckinpah's two most controversial films, it's just as entertaining as either - a eulogy for the death of the Old West.

Grade: A

Barcelona (1994): A great anti-anti-American comedy of manners, perhaps the best ever: director Whit Stillman deals with a complex subject - early '80s anti-Americanism in Cold War Spain - and treats it well, and I daresay evenhandedly (though admittedly incredibly slanted towards Americans, but who cares what European leftists think - they still believe that Karl Marx is relevant). Two young Americans, one an officer and another a businessman, enter Barcelona at the height of Spain's sexual revolution, and become involved with a pair of gorgeous Spanish women working for the World's Trade Fair (Mira Sorvino in her first major role). The dialogue is sharp as usual for Stillman, if a little less biting - but that's made up for by the increase in plot and action. Still, plot and action aren't exactly why anyone watches Stillman films (hint: his movies have none), it's the old-fashioned virtues of characterization and interesting dialogue that hook you in. Run to your video store if you haven't seen this - they don't make movies of this quality very often.

Grade: A

Barton Fink (1991): In the '30s, a lot of talented writers moved West to make a desperate living scripting for Hollywood and found out that the writer is at the low end of the totem pole in showbiz. This Coen brothers vehicle follows one such writer (John Turturro) who professes a love for the common man in theory (he's a leftist) while remaining steadfastly uninterested in the commen men he does meet (John Goodman in another showstealing role). Turturro meets a great writer (obviously modeled after William Faulkner) who turns out to be a drunken old boor in person, and generally becomes very disillusioned with the writer's lot in life. For further reference, read Nathanael West's Day of the Locust, which the Coen Bros. obviously modeled this film after.

Grade: A

Before Sunrise (1995): Since dinner and a movie seems to be the most popular form of dating in these United States, you need to take care and pick out the right movie to set the mood. This one is perfect. Why? Because the movie is like eavesdropping on a couple out on a date. Julie Delpe and Ethan Hawke don't do anything except wander around Vienna and talk; both are very attractive, and make for a nice couple. There's absolutely no plot, but that's typical of a Richard Linklater vehicle. Oh, and modern Vienna is the perfect backdrop, too - European cities are sexy in a way that American cities can never hope to be. I mean, c'mon, nobody ever uses "Cleveland" and "sexy" in the same sentence, do they?

Grade: B+

The Big Lebowski (1998): Like, dude. This, like, movie involves, like, this slacker dude called, like, "the Dude," who, like, gets mixed up in this, like, kidnapping scheme and stuff. It's, like, wicked funny, man. The plot, like, is cool and everything, but like, the best part is, like, the characters the Dude meets. Like, there's his friend, who's, like, psycho from, like, Vietnam and shit. And there's this, like, feminist chick who wants him to, like, get her pregnant. And there are, like, these Germans (Kraftwerk) who, like, are after him and stuff. And then there's this, like, toe. I can't explain, man, just, like, go see it. It's, like, funny, dude.

Grade: A-

Blood Simple (1984): Some cultist believe that the Coen Bros.' first movie was their best, but I disagree. The Coen Bros. haven't fully mastered the art of moviemaking yet, which means that the intended humor and intended horror don't fully mesh together as seamlessly as they should. It's in the Comedy of Errors genre, as most of the narrative drive, suspense, and comedy comes from the characters' wrong impressions. If someone just told the truth in this movie, then things would smooth out, but guess what? Everybody thinks they have something to hide. A decent murder mystery, if a bit murky; the best character is the hit man, who spouts some classic Coen lines about Texas and how, "in Russia, they only make 50 cents a day."

Grade: B

Bring Me The Head Of Alfredo Garcia (1974): A bizarre, gruesome little film. A Mexican druglord puts a price on Garcia's head, which leads to a bounty hunter digging up the grave of the already dead man. After chopping off the head to bring to the druglord, the bounty hunter goes nuts and starts talking to the head as if it were alive. The body count mounts and mounts, everyone double crosses every one else (in a particular arresting scene, an entire family is machine gunned because they don't approve of grave robbing). By the end almost everyone involved is dead; it's not among his best (you never really get to care about any of these people), but it's certainly Sam Peckinpah's weirdest.

Grade: B+

Lumiere For Lunkheads